And so this is SummerSlam:Buy or Sell?

Posted by Andy Durham on August 12, 2008 at 10:26 am under Professional | 3 Comments to Read

I don’t see the need to BUY SummerSlam and I sure would not want to be the one who had to try and SELL it. Getting it for FREE somewhere, now that’s a horse of a completely different color.

After watching last night’s WWE Monday Night Raw, one has to wonder what in the tarnation are they promoting here?

John Cena vs. Dave Batista? Are they taking us back to the days of Ohio Valley Wrestling when the Prototype(Cena) was battling Leviathan(Batista)? If they are trying to take us back to those good old days then what’s the purpose? Those days and matches were not good then and they are not good today or last night either. There is no appeal for Batista versus John Cena, and if there is, someone please fill me in on the hidden meaning of this match before Sunday gets here.

Triple H vs. The Great Khali at SummerSlam? This match couldn’t draw flies. I wouldn’t buy it, hate to have to try sell it, and the WWE has not done a thing to sell this match.

JBL vs. CM Punk on Sunday in a Pay-per-view that is supposed to slam the door on Summer? CM Punk can be a draw but JBL is an old-school character that trys to destroy by force and he is seeking to force it all down our throats and he is one of the most boring characters that I have ever seen. With Ron Simmons, JBL had entertainment value, but today for him in my opinion, there is no tomorrow. CM Punk has persona(with the LONG O) and back when he was a little Punker, a line I thought was on time, well Punk could kick and punch with the best of them but with JBL, NO WAY IN Hades!!!!! JBL, I can’t buy or sell; this long winded moron needs to go back to the broadcast booth and let the real wrestlers that can still get around in the ring, get in the ring.

Those are just a few of the features that you have to choose from on Sunday. Oh yeah, there’s also Edge, who by the way is the best actor in this WWE organization and my favorite character these days, and he has been my favorite for several years now. Edge(Adam Copeland) is a character and he can act. Edge vs. the Undetaker? The Undertaker is DEAD man. Not “The Dead Man”, he is DEAD. The Undertaker is a broken down old character who can’t move. They keep bringing him back and kids still like it but the kids are crazy. I want a character that can move. Give me a male version of Mickie James. That chick can move.

The bottom line according to the insiders is that this card sucks……Our writers could do much better. Change the card quickly. Let’s go with Triple H vs. Shawn Michaels. Michaels with a band-aide over the side of his eye to help correct his detached retina. Your supposed to have a patch OVER your eye for a detached retina, you WWE idiots. Triple H tells Shawn, his former Degeneration X partner, “I hate to do this to you buddy, but someone is going to get hurt, and like Andy always says, it ‘aint gonna be me”. The fans side with Michaels who can barely stand and Triple H sells this as the all-time heel. You killed Shawn Michaels!!!!!

If you are going to do a re-match have John Cena go at it with Edge. I know you are trying to promote with-in your brands with Raw vs. Raw and Smackdown vs. Smackdown, but you need to do something to spice this joker up, if not, the fans won’t Buy it and you can’t Sell it. Edge vs. Cena sounds great and I’ll have Edge win and move to Raw where he can be one of the biggest heels in the history of the business.

Kane found Rey Mysterio’s mask in that bag? Kane needs to put his own Red mask back on, and come back as “The Big Red Machine” and face off with the Undertaker in a loser leaves wrestling forever match, and the Undertaker loses and we are done with him forever and ever. Kane vs. Rey Mysterio? Who wants to see a 300 pound man fight a 170 pound guy who would be weighing 140 pounds without the steroid enhancements?

A stellar match would be Chris Jericho vs. CM Punk. Jericho is the second best heel in the business right now(just a step or two behind Edge), and Punk is fan favorite and you know he is, when the fans start chanting CM Punk, CM Punk…..The only alternative to top Punk-Jericho would be a retrun of Rob Van Dam, and then we have RVD vs. CM Punk in a name chant-match.

Other suggestions: Use Santino Marella in a major role and give Mickie James the women’s spotlight and let her run with it.

The WWE has their work cut out for them and they need to change several things. As for SummerSlam, I wouldn’t BUY it and I would hate to have to SELL it, but I will watch it for FREE.


  • Mick said,

    We are getting the webcast at The Elks Lodge for a bunch of our kids. Will be projected on big screen (more likely sheet!). Pizza, sodas, etc. I agree the card kind of stinks and I have never been a big fan of the large lumbering types. I think the kids will still think it is cool. If we pull it off we might do it again some time!

    Love the site. Should see me lurking here quite often from now on. Need an amateur swimming correspondant?

    Mick

  • Jim said,

    Andy, you are my buddy, but how could you spend so much time, words and thoughts on WRESTLING? You don’t have to explain! You obviously a fan-‘nough said!

  • Andy said,

    Thanks Jim, I may get the call-up some day to WWE creative, you never know, and if did we would have more UFC-Style matches and we might come up with more Ken Shamrock/Brock Lesnar kind of characters that are ready to explode and pound at any second. Umaga will be gone(fired) in 6o seconds. We need real live Monsters…..

    Mick, I had heard about the Elks Club and their Sunday showing and I forgot to mention it. Good to hear from you and I hope the kids enjoy the pay-per-view……